First Law of Procrastination: Procrastination shortens the job and places the responsibility for its termination on someone else (i.e., the authority who imposed the deadline).
First Law of Socio-Genetics: Celibacy is not hereditary.
First Rule of History: History doesn't repeat itself; historians merely repeat each other.
Flo Capp's Observation: The next best thing to doing something smart is not doing something stupid.
Flon's Law: There is not now, and never will be, a language in which it is the least bit difficult to write bad programs.
Flucard's Corollary: Anything dropped in the bathroom falls in the toilet.